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And I live in it.

The first few days of my holiday have been pretty crazy and as a result I’m starting to get ill for Christmas.  No matter, there’s time off to recover and if I can just relax a bit, maybe I’ll get better.

So last year I wrote “For the new year: 2009 roadmap” and I guess a similar one for 2010 is due soon.  Looking back on things makes me a little sad, and from the crap I’ve had to endure recently, I’m somewhere between wanting to punch something and curl up in a ball.  While there is much to be said for the curl-into-a-ball approach, I don’t have the necessary support (if you want to come hug me and tell me it’s all fine, then I’ll gladly retract) to foster such an apathetic cry for attention.

Alas then, I must consider how to proceed in 2010 and the Christmas break will be an opportunity to do that.

I now realise that the choices you make now affect the rest of your life.  A lesson learned for 2009.  Choose wisely, for good or bad, make the best of what you have.

Following on from my post near the start of the year (For the new year: 2009 roadmap), here’s my six month review.

Become more financially stable

I set out two main financial decisions to make in 2009:  Clear student loan and dent mortgage.  I did look into both these decisions and have done neither.  Have I done nothing?  Absolutely not.  Analysis has helped me make other financial decisions which benefit my stability as a whole.

It’s going to be a hard year.  Work aren’t paying any bonuses this year and the economy is set to slump even further.  It’s a long road for the UK to get anywhere near stable and the housing market, which is of very personal interest to me, is besides one or two blips which the media never cease to take joy in reporting, not getting any better.  The warmer weather is lifting spirits for now, heaven help us in the darker months to come.

Progress satisfactory, continue working hard.  Evaluate:  Live for now vs. save for tomorrow?

Improve skill set

I had two goals here:  Learn to fly and continue piano lessons and I’m happy to report some progress.  Back in December I wrote  that I wanted “to make 2009 the Year of the PPL“.  That’s what I’ve done.  I made my first flight for the PPL on the 24th January and since then have flown 15.5 hours.  I’m told progress is going well, and I’m still alive so I must be doing something right :)

And piano?  I said I needed to restructure to give me more time to practice.  I think I was too unrealistic here.  I’m still very busy and continue to find it difficult to fit in my practice.  Progress has been ok, but a little slow for my liking.  I know I can do better but I have no idea how to allow it to happen.  Nevertheless I took my Grade 1 practical exam last Thursday and eagerly await the results.  My teacher informs me I am allowed two weeks rest only.  Then it’s on to Grade 2 :p

Progress good, start work on PPL theory for exams, keep pushing the piano for now.

Improve health

Head bows in shame here.  Health is always the first thing to go when you’re put under pressure.  I said I’d do two things here:  Get fit and No junk food.  Who was I kidding?  I type amongst Coke cans and beside about 20 bags of crisps.  Uneaten, but it’s only a matter of time.

Seriously, I’m killing myself.  Eating rubbish, not exercising, getting up at 6am and not going to sleep until midnight will lead me to an early grave.  I feel fatter, I feel sicker, tired, I get colds.

Something needs to happen here.  I’ve done two things this evening (partly they reminded me to write this review) to get fitter.  I bought a unicycle as a new skill to learn that I can try to master over the summer months.  It should provide at least minimal exercise.  I’ve also enlisted some help to get to the gym.  I’ve never been to a gym.  Swimming pool yes, but never to a proper gym to use the equipment.  If it comes off, I’ll make every effort to go and get fit.

It’s still not enough.  I need to start taking care of myself.  Above everything else I’ve written about here, it all means nothing if I’m sick.  I’ve had long running health problems that are finally being addressed and will see me visiting the ‘top dogs’ at Royal London Hospital in two months.  Going into hospital last week is what has really hit home.

Progress fair, must improve as a matter of, well, life and death.

Improve work environment

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting…
[If... Rudyard Kipling]

I thought I could improve the company and improve myself.  I’ve done one at the expense of another and it hasn’t been in my favour.  Persistence has won out so far this year and I’ve introduced some things to the company which I’ve fought long and hard for.  Everyone seems to be enjoying the benefits except me.

From an idealistic standpoint, it’s good to watch everyone using techniques and tools which you’ve worked so hard to introduce and build, but at the same time crippling not to be able to use them yourself.  Like the inventor of the motorcar, forbidden to drive.

For the rest of this year I need desperately to improve my professional skill set.  It’s starting to turn this way and I only hope it continues and isn’t too late.

Progress fair.  Work hard.  Remember to expect something in return.

I’m learning something important this year.  Take chances while you have them.  “Have happiness while it’s here”.

That’s why I’m changing my business model.

For a number of years I’ve run a hosting company.  The products and services are exceptional, great value and I can take pride in what I’ve created.

However, hosting is not expensive (to the customer).  The cheapest we sell is £36/yr.  Yup, per YEAR.  I’ve spent more than that on a single night out.  If you want something a bit meatier, for your business maybe it’s £60/yr.

We charge in quarterly instalments and I’m sick of chasing payments of £9.

It gets even sillier when discounts become involved.  The margins on a £3/mo package are so ridiculously slim that I simply can’t offer a financial discount without losing money.  Why do I do this to myself?

Well.  When I started, it made sense.  The market was different back then and we had budget hosting cornered.  Smaller payments meant smaller losses if a customer left and had more financial stability overall.

I can tell you though that this model simply doesn’t scale.  Reseller hosting has always been my most profitable and most rewarding area.  I can focus on providing stable, high availability, high quality services to other businesses to help us both grow.

Time to rethink.

Kirby Ferguson explains…

I like to have Last.fm on during work sometimes, and occasionally it really does discover me an artist I actually like.  Not as good as Pandora of course (RIP), but welcome nonetheless.  I’ve decided to showcase some bands I’ve found over the years, some through LFM, others through luck and chance.  Here then are a few bands you’ve never heard of.

Howards Alias – “Southampton based Howards Alias came to life at the tail end of 1999, and after a various self released demos and gigs, released their debut album “The Chameleon Script” (2002) on Good Clean Fun Records, to a very positive reaction. After touring the album relentlessly, in January 2004 the band recorded 3 songs for a split release with US band DESA, ready for the bands’ joint UK tour together.”

The wikipedia article has this to say about their split: “… Jon and Steve really felt that they didn’t really have any stability at home. Neither of them had a place to live, so they were sleeping on mates’ floors and things like that. They couldn’t afford to buy food a lot of the time. After a while it kind of got to them both. …”

Comeback Kid – Originally from one of the guys at work…  “Comeback Kid (CBK for short) is a hardcore band from Winnipeg, Canada, formed in 2002 by Andrew Neufeld and Jeremy Hiebert, who were both members of the band Figure Four, currently on hiatus.”

Billy Talent – Staying on a Canadian theme, I first saw Billy Talent at Download Festival.  “Billy Talent is a Juno Award-winning Canadian rock band formed in 1993. They performed and recorded together for about a decade before finding a wide mainstream following. Originally called Pezz, the group originates from Mississauga, Ontario, but now hail from Toronto, Ontario. The band, as of September 2007, finished 16 months of touring, and have returned home to work on their new album.”

Sonic Boom Six – A LFM classic…  “Formed in Manchester, England in 2002, Sonic Boom Six represent the most compelling soundclash to rise from the underground in years.”

Jonathan Coulton – A geek favourite, more recently known for composing the end theme for the game Portal, Still Alive.  “Every week for a year Coulton released a new song for free on his website as part of his Thing a Week podcast, on topics as diverse as vengeful nerds, self-loathing giant squid, partially-imagined historical figures, and devotees of a certain Swedish prefab furniture store.”

MC Frontalot – Geekier still, MC Frontalot is the founder of his own genre, Nerdcore.  “MC Frontalot is the stage name of Damian Hess, a hip hop musician and self-proclaimed “world’s 579th-greatest rapper.” Many of his songs deal with things nerdy in nature, which has led him to be categorized as nerdcore, a word he himself coined in his first single, “Nerdcore Hip Hop”.”

Honourable mention:  Captain Everything!, [spunge], Nouvelle Vague, Puffy AmiYumi, Rival Schools

Keep your ears open kids.

Swimming tonight?  Maybe not.  I put my stuff in the car this morning to go tonight, but during the day have just got really ill.   Need to wrap up warm and get to bed early in the hope this will pass by Saturday.

Lots to do this weekend including sunglasses, flying (although the forecast is rain atm) and a trip to Fenstanton.

Cute Wednesday tomorrow :)

I bought a crap bass on eBay, trying to learn…  I feel the need to learn some porno slides…

Cute Wednesday tomorrow kids!

So, on the way to the tube station tonight I came across one of London’s creative beggars.  This guy had used film effects to graft an arm-break gash onto his arm.  I must admit, it did look very good.  He was asking for money for “a taxi to the hospital”.

I considered giving him a pound to take a photo, but decided against the possibility of getting mugged.

Am now on a train to Grantham.  More expensive than driving, but much more relaxing, takes half the time and comes with free WiFi.  Win!

A few things for 2009, sort of a new year’s resolution but more of a 2009 roadmap:

Become more financially stable

At the moment the UK economy is dying.  People are getting poorer at an alarming rate, food prices are rocketing and the pound is losing its value in the global marketplace.  I need a new game plan in 2009 to survive and to support the other things on this list.

Clear student loan: A lot of people tell me you should never pay your student loan off on account of the low interest rate.  However, these people are the ones who are necessarily always in debt.  It’s not the best ROI for me (the next point is) to clear the loan, but it is achievable to make a dent in 2009 and is one less thing to worry about.

Dent mortgage: Another tricky decision.  The way the economy is going and the way the housing market has crashed has put me not far from negative equity.  I easily foresee this happening by Q2 2009.  On the one hand, I can pay something off and reduce my interest charges, on the other hand, the rates are ever reducing anyway and when it all goes bang, will I have thrown my money away?  I’m going to look into this and make a decision early.

Improve skill set

I like learning, I like new things, it’s important to be valuable.  Next year will see me improve my skills with something new and something old.

Learn to fly: This is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time.  It’s been a while since my interest was last sparked but I’ve worked hard this year to put myself in a strong position to make 2009 the Year of the PPL.  I have a medical booked 2nd week of January and aim to start the weekend after.  A life-long commitment which wasn’t taken lightly, however, once I start something, it’s all guns blazing.

Continue piano lessons: I’ve been learning the piano for a few months now.  Perhaps I should say I’ve been learning classically for a few months now, with a teacher.  Before that, I taught myself using my parents’ piano and finally bought my own early this year.  It hasn’t been going too well due to time pressures.  I just don’t have time to practice or study the theory.  In 2009 I’m bringing the project management techniques I’ve championed commercially to this area of my life.  I’m going to restructure my time and lessons to allow me more time to learn.

Improve health

I used to be fairly active, still chunky but a good weight.  After too many chocolates, cans of coke and crisps at Christmas (and for the latter part of the year) it’s time to step up a gear.

Get fit: I used to go swimming twice a week when I lived on my own.  Now, living back with parents is a drain on the independence I need to do this.  It also seems harder to go, especially when it’s cold and I find myself increasingly more tired after work (see final point).  I’d like to pick up swimming again.  Hopefully the local pool will announce some discount schemes to entice those feeling guilty after Christmas.  However, in the crashing economy, this might turn into a money drain which is why I’m reading Zen Habits to start an exercise regime at home.

No junk food: I eat a lot of junk food.  When I lived on my own, it was easier to eat healthily.  If you buy your own food you can choose not to buy crisps and coke and find something better to replace them with.  Back with my parents (who have 50 cans of coke stacked in the corner and a cupboard bursting with crisps) temptation is harder to avoid.  I will cut down on crisps and coke in the new year.  I’ve already made improvements at work where bringing my own food in not only saves money but avoids the chips and pizza options which form the limited choice from the surrounding shops.  Must make sure this continues.

Improve work environment

This is a big must for me.  Work forms the majority of my time and if work is stressful and tiring, so is the rest of my life.  Like the Kung Fu Panda, I eat when I’m upset, and if I’m upset my vision is clouded which means I can’t keep a sensible eye on finances and can’t learn effectively.  Work needs to be fun, exciting and productive to support the rest of my life.

Improve the company: Recently I changed my attitude towards work.  Up until now I always assumed that good would prevail and the machine would begin to fix itself.  After all, everyone at the company is clever, cares about their work and generally seems interested in improving.  Everyone is as stuck as I was.  If you don’t improve things, no one will.  My posts on Overloaded Operators (a coding blog I run with a friend and co-employee) have changed tone recently to reflect this.  A few weeks ago I ran a presentation written in my own time which aimed to introduce a new technology to the company and improve the developers.  It had good attendance and I’ve received positive feedback.  This is the way forward.  In 2009 I will continue my efforts to improve the company by any means necessary.  Eventually it will pay off for everyone and most of all, for myself.

Improve myself: 2009 will be a very busy year.  With new skills planned, new exercise regimes and working even harder, it’s going to be difficult to fit everything in.  A software developer by trade, I find it harder to find time to develop using cutting edge techniques at home so I can improve my skills commercially.  As part of the previous point, I will foster an environment of continuous improvement where I will be able to bring new technologies into the workplace and provide time to investigate cutting edge techniques.  This will allow me to improve my own skills during work time.

There we go, that’s my 2009 roadmap.  A busy year ahead!  Lets see how it goes :)

Another late Friday Five…  This time from the desk of E.  I get to stay for 6 days, eeek!  Tho also, yay! :)

1. What’s one really cool/useful/nice thing you purchased for yourself this year?

A Utili-Key.

2. What’s one area of your life you really improved this year?

I haz a real girl.

3. Who or what was a regular source of encouragement or inspiration to you this year?

The few friends at home and work who have shown me that there is always hope.

4. What’s something nice you did for someone else this year?

Hmm…  Hopefully I’ve helped some peoples now and then…

5. In what way was 2008 better than 2007?

As #2.  Also, work stuffs ever so slightly.